Talofa William, while your poem is short you tell us a lot. I understand that this poem talks about a person who is very tired because of choices they made. Keep up the creative poetry. Well done!
Malo William, your poem is really good but so short, I love how your talking about yourself ( I hope its about yourself) by the way I was expecting it longer but keep up the good work.
Hey William, I really enjoyed reading your poem.I like how you started to rhyme at the beginning however,I would highly recommend you to try extending it a little bit more but other then that keep up the good writing.
Malo e lelei William, your poem is really good and I recond that you should be going to sleep early and stop playing fortnite because when you come to school you look like your going to fall asleep. lol
Talofa William, I really enjoyed every part of your poem you really explained how tired you feel, my advice for you is maybe you could try and add some words that rhyme but besides that keep the hard work up hope to see more.
Talofa William, while your poem is short you tell us a lot. I understand that this poem talks about a person who is very tired because of choices they made. Keep up the creative poetry. Well done!
ReplyDeleteMalo William, your poem is really good but so short, I love how your talking about yourself ( I hope its about yourself) by the way I was expecting it longer but keep up the good work.
ReplyDeleteHey William, I really enjoyed reading your poem.I like how you started to rhyme at the beginning however,I would highly recommend you to try extending it a little bit more but other then that keep up the good writing.
ReplyDeleteMalo e lelei William, your poem is really good and I recond that you should be going to sleep early and stop playing fortnite because when you come to school you look like your going to fall asleep. lol
ReplyDeleteTalofa William, I really enjoyed every part of your poem you really explained how tired you feel, my advice for you is maybe you could try and add some words that rhyme but besides that keep the hard work up hope to see more.
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ReplyDeleteHey William I really enjoyed reading your poem i hope to hear more from you
ReplyDeleteHi william I really like enjoyed reading your poem. I like to see more.
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